Megan's Birth Story

Today is Megan's 1 week birthday. Thought I'd take the occasion to recount her birth for the blog...

We were an hour late getting to the hospital for the induction, we were tired and a little weirded out and excited about it. We entered the big, fancy lobby that makes Prentice look like a fancy hotel, and went on up to the 8th floor to L&D. Dr. Arof met us in the waiting room and talked about what to expect. Tanya our doula was finishing up with another birth and would join us in a bit.

Things went pretty leisurely at first. I put on the gown and we scouted out our fancy L&D room. The view was all city, no lake, but still nice. The bathroom was huge. We were visited by two nurses who introduced themselves and a couple of anesthesiologists. One took a drug history and another signed me up for an epidural study, which was a mistake. More on that later.

They got the I.V. in my left hand and started w/ 2mm (or is that ml?) pitosin, then broke the waters. Once they broke the bag of waters things went quickly and picked up pace. Tanya arrived just after that just in time for the contractions to hit. She talked me thru them, holding one hand while I squeezed the heck out of Ben's hand. I paced the room with my IV pole, visited the bathroom, sat on the birth ball, and stood and swayed. I never wanted to lie or sit. If allowed to I likely would have stood for the entire thing!

Tanya had to ask repeatedly to reduce the pitosin b/c she was worried about hyper stimulation, and my contractions which were suddenly and consistently less than 2 minutes apart, about 1 and a half or so. We finally got them to reduce to 1mm of pit. I was trying to clear my head and think was it time for the epidural when Ben started to say, if Val can't think, then she needs the epidural now. I really wasn't getting breaks between contractions all the sudden. Dr. Arof checked me and I was 4cm dilated and he also agreed on the epidural, and turned off the pitosin. So from here on out, it was just me. He said he was going to be in a C-section for the next hour but he didn't think I'd be having the baby before he got back. Famous last words!

This is when it got bad. The gal doing the epidural study came in with her kit and kicked out Ben and Tanya, said it would be just 20 minutes. West Sub had let Ben stay, so this was a surprise. If I had known what would happen I might have skipped the epidural. To get my spine straight they laid me on my side and she jabbed around a bit, which hurt. The study was to give a little medicine and take pressure readings, give more, take another reading. I did not realize that is what it would be. They tried to get me to lie still. I seemed to lose all control of my body at this point, and the pressure to push, or what feels like you desperately need to poop, was immense. I started yelling things, like first I begged for Ben back. Then I was yelling that the contractions still hurt and why wasn't the epidural working. Then when they kept telling me to lie still I was trying to say I couldn't help it and a lot of "oh god" and "help me" and stuff like that. Finally I yelled somebody hold my legs still. And I told this young nurse trying to hold the monitor on my abdomen to stop it because it hurt. They called more and more people in, and there were all these voices and no single person helping me. They couldn't get the heart rate, the baby's heart rate had slowed and they couldn't find it anymore, so without asking, they put in the internal monitor. They kept lifting my leg to check me, to put the monitor in, then to check me again, and it seemed no time had gone by and it was "she's 6 centimeters" "she's 8" "she's dilated to 9" Then they were telling me to stop pushing. Well, I wasn't doing any pushing on purpose. My body was doing whatever it wanted. They flipped me onto my other side for some reason to do with the epidural. A nurse finally came and peered down into my face and took off her face mask and told me to breathe and did some coaching, blowing in my face. I have no idea who she was, but I swear she was the only one in the room over 25 (maybe 40ish) and I just remember her brown eyes. Thank you, whoever you are.

This little crisis was of their own making. Why they would kick out labor support during the epidural for a second pregnancy, which notoriously go faster, when I'm alredy 4cm and no breaks between contractions which is transitional labor (the last stage before pushing), is beyond me. It is not wise. But I got through it, because what else do you do?

Finally Tanya was there, and suddenly Ben, and the back-up doctor, Dr. Katz, appeared at the base of the bed, and they were telling me to push. It was like they were speaking a foreign language, I was very confused. I could move my legs and feel beyond some surface numbness on my legs, and the anesthesiologist put an alcohol swab on my belly asking if it felt cold, which it did, then on my leg, where it did not, altho I could still feel it. I could feel that "ring of fire" when the perenium is stretched. The doc said "just one more push" and I must say I just didn't believe her. I managed a couple of pushes at most, and suddenly the baby was out!!!

(Ben's side of the story is also interesting, and he was feeling insane being locked out. He recalls it as nearly an hour while he repeatedly sought permission to return. Then when he got in it was chaos around me and he was very upset. I focused on him and gripped his hand while I tried to push.)

So I was already in the mode where I announced some insane request to the room repeatedly until I got help, so I switched to "I want her" as my mantra--the baby, which was a girl. She was red and her fingers were purple, and the cord was blue and she was doing that newborn cry. I got her, and she was amazing. This little thing! They switched out towels around her to dry her and prevent cooling of and Ben and I just focused on her.

Tanya had to repeatedly tell the nursing staff to hold off while we had bonding time. They asked maybe 6 times, and the doctor backed us up, which really helped. They just wanted to weigh her, do the apgar, and admit her to the system. But those first 45 minutes of alert time are key. We got a good latch and she drank, with Tanya's help. It was wonderful.

Meanwhile the doc was in and out of the uterus because the placenta would not disengage. They found it had fused membranes. I pushed most of it out with her help, then Dr. Arof joined Dr. Katz and she did a cuterage (like a d&c)--I could feel pressure and hear the snick-snack like scissors! Creepy, but apparently taking care of it then prevented hemoraging and hospitalization later. Also I was already dilated (tho they said I was already contracting). Excellent news was that I had no stitches!!! Just a scrape. They say the placenta did not look 100% healthy, and it was good that they induced when they did.

I know the whole thing sounds crazy, but I'm glad it's over and I'm so glad to have this beautiful girl in my arms. Coming down so fast did give her a cephalo hematoma, however, which is a giant bruise like a pocket of blood on her head. It will resolve in a few weeks. They x-rayed her and there was no skull fracture. She's fine. Breaking down the old red blood cells does create billirubins (sp) as a byproduct, however, so there is jaundice. That and some latch difficulties added to jaundice, but it is already going down and she's eating, pooping, and gaining weight like a trooper!

Megan's Birth Photo

It's a Girl!!!

I'm sitting in bed at the hospital typing on a little keypad attached to the nurse caller thingie--you know, the device by the bed that you call the nurse with (Ben says, the device you push to make the nurses not come, heh). I'm seeing the blog entry on a big, wide-screen TV. Cool,huh? We've just ordered room service and the food is fantastic. Ben is reading what I write and making sarcastic comments from the dad-bench. Oh, sorry, he says they are "snide or snarky." I sit corrected. "And the bed is an uncomfortable couch that folds out into an even more uncomfortable bed." Little Megan is in her hospital bassinette by the bed. Ben describes this as a "deluxe petri dish." We are tired and a little slap happy.

Megan Hillary was born yesterday, January 9th at 1:21 in the afternoon after a bizarre labor I'll have to describe another time. She was 7lbs 12oz, and 18 inches. She's amazingly tiny. I can't believe Tyler was ever this small. Getting a latch on is again a problem, but we are working through it best we can with our doula
helping. We haven't seen the lactation consultants rumored to work here yet, despite numorous requests and orders for them written into our records in the system here. But she will not be dehydrated like Tyler was. I've brought my breast pump and whenever she doesn't get a latch (it's hit and miss) I pump and she takes colostrum by syringe now. She dislikes two different kinds of bottle nipples already, one of which I had special ordered b/c it is shaped like a breast. She wants the real thing.

Megan looks like no-one I know, but she's really beautiful. Ben adds "in a squishy baby kind of way." Her newest nickname is "scrunchy face." This is in addition to Megalon and Megaweapon, the earlier Scumby of course, and, since Tyler is "boogie boy" we've decided she will be "disco girl." She has a round face, very dark eyes, wisps of brown hair, little rosebud lips, and mini Mobley ears. She has a pink complection and is a little rashy around her face which is already fading. We are both really into her.

...Megan is smacking her lips. Gotta go. Wish me luck!

I'm at the Hospital!

Check this out! Free Internet access! I'm just getting settled in for the induction at Prentice Women's Hospital. I've been having contractions all night/morning, too! They do hurt.

Will report back when possible! This place is so hi tech. Hee hee hee!



P.S. Turns out in the exam yesterday the doc did what they call stripping the membranes, which is separating w/ finger the bag of waters from the uterus lining around the opening. That's why it hurt so much! Angry that they didn't tell me. It's very common, and is supposed to release hormones to bring on contractions. Did it work? Hmmmm...

The Final Countdown

Well, I'm scheduled to induce tomorrow at the crack of dawn. I asked if I could make it later than 6:30 but they told me the hospital is booked and I was lucky I didn't get 3 a.m.! Sheesh.

Anyway, 6:30 makes getting Tyler to day-care in the morning kindof difficult. Especially since Alice has a new skin condition (hives) and can't help out like she originally thought she could. Which I hate to admit is a disappointment; I'm sure I'm much too sensitive these days and wish I had more help. So my mom says she'll spend the night tonight and get Tyler fed and transferred in the morning. Then I don't know, guess she'll hang out or something? Or visit the hospital maybe, I don't know.

Will call Tanya tonight and come up with a game plan for the morning. I do wish I could go into labor naturally, you know? Seems like it's happening, just very slowly. And it's true I'm anxious to have the baby! But still. The gender is a surprise, the name will be a surprise, why not the birth day itself? Or, it would be cool to have it be the 10th since Tyler was born on a 10th, if we're picking days. Or go today, the 8th, which is Elvis's and David Bowie's birthday. Then I also think to myself, that originally the 9th was one of the due dates when the date was originally disputed at the first doctor's, before the 13th week ultrasound settled it on the 7th. So, does that mean the 9th is destined? Or does that mean we ought to count the 9th too soon and give it more time? I don't know. I'm overthinking this. I'm happy to get the doctor I want at least. And you never know how long the labor will take! Might not actually come on the 9th after all! But I don't believe that, not really.

I am still crampy and getting mild contractions from the exam earlier today. It's common for early labor to carry on evenings then fade the next morning. It would be way cool to show up in the morning already in labor. I'll see if I can't will labor to start with the power of my mind, ha ha... Well, you never know!

Well, this is my last post I believe, until I give birth and post a narrative about the experience afterward. Which is what I plan to do. Until then...

Wish me luck!

Last Appointment

I'm sorry to say my last appointment today was a disappointment. I was excited to see Dr. Arof again and find out about my progress and ask my list of questions about the induction and talk about my doula. I was in the waiting room ready and waiting at about 15 minutes late, and I'm not sure if that wasn't the first mistake. The second was not asking sooner why the wait was so long. I was waiting about 45 minutes or so when I got up and ran into Dr. Arof on his way out. He was really sorry, and he should be, tho one can blame the nurse staff if you want to. Unfortunately for me, Arof's nurse Bridgett ("Bridge" for short--isn't that cute?) wasn't there today and when that happens I often get "oh we thought you were in an ultrasound and were waiting for word" or some other why-we-called-you-in-late exhuse. Which has cost me unpaid PTO time from work twice in recent past. Turns out also that Dr. Arof had a split office schedule today and the afternoon he was due in his Northbrook office. Which was the whole reason why I came in the morning directly to him when my NST was in the afternoon.

If I were a long-time patient of his or if I liked the other doctors as much it wouldn't be such a big deal. But the day before my scheduled induction, I really, really wanted to talk to him. And I'm sensitive already to the feeling of being without help or lost, as I felt with my first doctor. They rushed me in to see Dr. Katz, which is my 2nd choice for on-call doc (she's nice) but I was emotional and try as I might I couldn't manage to hold back my tears, and she didn't know what to do with me. She made a sad joke, "oh I know you're crying because you're so glad to see me." And the appointment was very rushed.

Anyway I'm still 2 cm dilated, and she didn't give it a percentage (so I don't know if I'm still 75% effaced or if this means more) but she said my cervix is "oh, yes, really thin now." Gosh it really hurt. Each time I get examined I am sore to the touch, but man did it hurt this time. She said she could feel the head and also the baby's back. The way it felt, my cervix must be all stretched out and wide, she could really get her hand around it/the baby's head. It was amazing.

My blood pressure it really good, 120/80, and at the NST 128/80 (after walking over there). The two gals at the NST, nurses both, Maggie and Karen, are so friendly and so talkative and excited it's not hard to cheer up around them. The baby gave excellent NST results and was extremely active, kicking against the monitors and rolling around. Baby has a very assertive physical personality. (I'm thinking girl's basketball, heh heh!) Maggie and Karen want a phone call or see a picture of the baby so I will probably send Maggie and Karen an announcement at their office. They are very sweet.

I have a few ideas about how to solve this disappointment from the doc appt. I can 1) call Dr. Arof at the Northbrook office and see if I can't ask him some questions, 2) set aside some time to chat with him before the induction in the morning so that I get my concerns met before the procedure begins, and 3) chat with Tanya my doula about some of the questions too and come up with our own plan.

I am very crampy and sore after the exam. Spotting of course. Some of it is low-grade contractions, not the serious kind, tho. It would be neat to show up tomorrow morning already in labor!

Pelvic Shift

Last night Ben worked the evening shift and I was on my own. Contractions hit around 8, just before Tyler's bedtime, then suddenly my pelvis seemed to pinch on the left back side and shoot pains down to my knee. It was incredible, and I let Tyler stay up until Ben got home. I hobbled upstairs when poor tired Tyler wanted to go up and get his blankie and paci, a sure sign he's ready for bed. But I could not manage to change his diaper and he laid on his toddler bed fully dressed. I took of his shoes from my vantage point of the blue chair next to the bed, but that's all. He climbed on me for a story and the pain brought tears to my eyes. I love him so much and it's so hard to not be able to do something for him or nurture him when he's feeling affectionate like that, it broke my heart. I called Daddy-o to ask him to come home on time and tell him Tyler would still be up, and Ben was welcomed by a Tyler-monkey with arms and legs both! It was very sweet, and I was sad and grateful. Tyler is such a sweet boy, and Ben such a good, loving dad. I'm lucky.

I asked Ben for a lower back/pelvis massage. And this is very cool: He could feel the baby's head! He was kind of freaked a bit, and so was very gentle. He's like, is that the head? What is this? This wasn't here last time I gave you a massage (that morning!) there. Ben is excellent at the massage! This morning he even added positive statements in a relaxing voice, at it was really really cool.

Nesting Instinct?

Re: mood swings: Okay, first I want to kill everyone who causes the phone to ring. Then I miss my friends and invite them over all weekend. Then, after picking fights with my hubbie and not letting him get within 10 feet of me for months, I suddenly am on fire when he's near me and can't get enuf. Which passes very quickly. Now, after increasing fatigue that feels like I have weights added to every limb for the past weeks, today I'm suddenly light and full of energy. I've been cooking and cleaning and it's bizarre. Just today, tho. It wasn't long before I pooped out in the evening!

False Alarm

Sunday evening and all thru last night I had steady contractions, lasting about 45 to 60 seconds and about 3 to 4 minutes apart. They would start and build in a band from the abdomen around the small of the back, and become uncomfortably painful but easy to talk through, then fade and resolve. We called Tanya and she was at a party right across the street, which we thought was funny. She reviewed for me how to time the contractions and suggested the shower test and was ready to come over whenever we were too. We got the watch out and timed the contractions, and watched a movie. We had a friend over, Michelle, who gave me an awesome lower back/pelvis massage! She's a natural.

Ben and I got really nervous and excited when the contractions passed the shower test before bedtime--a hot shower often makes them go away if they are false or early labor. But then they were more spaced apart, and we went to bed. I slept through most of them but got awakened a good handful of times by the pain of some of them. Still felt them in the morning, but by mid-morning they were going away. We were so disappointed! So, Ben went to work.

Tanya explained that this is very common for second-time pregnancies. That often early labor like this is lightly felt in first pregnancies so there are less false starts. But this is just early labor and normal, and can go on for two weeks before the due date. Which is about what I've been doing!

Trying Everything to Induce Labor

I suspect most of what they suggest, if not all, is myth. I'm already eating spicy foods, as that is what the fetus seems to want. I'm not jumping up and down, that seems masochistic. I'll just say for the record that sex does not work, either ...ahem! Altho in a very bizarre twist I actually wanted it, which lately is unheard of. Heh heh heh! It's hard to know if stimulating the "girls" as suggested in What To Expect works or not, but I have greatly irritated the skin there which is worse! I am going to try sheer will power. Or maybe I should chant as in one of Tyler's favorite books: "I think I can, I think I can, I think I can..."

That Fed-Up Feeling

Apparently it's normal to get fed-up with pregnancy here at the end.

Personally I'm mostly sick of being sick. Looking back, I first caught the cold/series of colds I've been trading off with Ben and Tyler and day-care back on my blog entry of December 3rd. So yes, that's a month of being sick up to today. I was miserable last night, coughing all night and waking everybody up in the house repeatedly. This morning I coughed so much I was sick, and of course simultaneously ruined my pants and had to start all over washing up and getting dressed for work again. It's demoralizing. Last night I started to cry and Ben was very supportive and rubbed my back and tried to give me a pep talk about having a positive attitude so that my pregnancy is a better experience overall. I know he's right, intellectually, but it's hard.

I still have the ringing in my ears and the heartburn, the loose joints in my pelvis which have become more painful recently, sore belly and bosom (using old fashioned language ha ha), difficulty bending over, standing up, sitting up out of bed, and standing for too long, twingy carpal tunnel, some odd swelling, incontinence, constant fatigue, and mood swings, to name the main ones. I feel I could be much more accepting of all this if I felt well on top of it all. I'm sick of pricking my fingers to test my blood glucose levels, and I want sweets.

Mainly--and this is much more amusing--I have high irritability. Some times Ben accuses me of trying to pick a fight. But what do you do when everything he does irritates you? When everything your husband is doing is clearly wrong? Heh heh heh. (I know how bad that sounds!)

Over the weekend I decided to limit the calls I take. Sorry! Everyone has been calling to see if we've had the baby yet. Um, you'll get a call, we promise! Of course I appreciate the attention. I just am not handling it very well. So I let Ben take the calls. I'm not at all reasonable, you know. It's just as likely that if no-one was calling I'd be hurt, so you can't win. Sometimes what sets me off is too much cheerfulness and excitement. Or reassurances that I'm really okay if I'm expressing being fed up. And Trina, honey, you can "call twice a day until I have that baby" if you want, bless your heart (as our Grandma would say), but if you do that, you'll have to be happy with getting Ben! (You know I love you!) Of course our parents always get thru to one or both of us. And they are being good sports about this. (Kudos to Madalen who actually made me laugh, even after I answered the phone with "be careful, I might bite your head off." We're getting along great!)

For the record, I've gone thru my cell phone's address book and made sure it was filled with everyone's number.

Another very annoying this is, what on earth can I respond to "so you're still pregnant!" Um, yes, this is me, and this is my belly, and clearly I'm still pregnant. Congratulations on your keen observation skills! That's what I'd like to say to coworkers who say that to me! Hehe. Great way for me to keep friendly, huh?

Another special joy is the reactions I'm getting from strangers. Strangers! On my way to the doctor, in elevators or hallways, in brief visits to small, managable stores like Walgreens, I get comments and big, saucer-eyed looks. One woman had the audacity to ask if I had twins. 'Cause I'm so huge. Then she gave my belly a look like she didn't believe me. This one gal in the elevator didn't even have anything cute to say, she demanded my due date and just seemed afraid I'd give birth right there and then. So now I'm apparently scaring people!

You know, I should play it up. When I get the saucer-eyed looks, I should stop and rub my belly and do some labor breathing, really give them a scare! Heh.

If you think of any other scare tactics or funny sarcastic replies I could prepare, let me know!

No Progress At Latest Dr. Visit

Still at 2 cm dilation and 75% effacement. "About the same," according the Dr. Halpern, Dr. Arof's associate while he's on vacation.

Tried to talk to him about the doula but he doesn't seem as supportive as Dr. Arof is. I really hope we get Dr. Arof for the birth. Halpern wasn't responsive about me coming in more during active labor and gave me the same-old about 45 second long contractions 3 minutes apart. Remember my Solstice contractions? That's what they were, and they were more than 3 hours worth, then went away. By that calculation, I would have gone in to the hospital and, what? I don't know. Been sent home? Been put on petosin? I don't know. And Halpern seemed less supportive of the doula being an R.N. and told me "she's not a midwife, she's just a support during labor." It was kind of disappointing. I miss Arof.

I'm so tired!

Head Cold Continues

Tyler is better apart from a raspy voice. Back to sleeping thru the night and breathing well enuf to nap. But now I've caught it. It's not fair!

I was afraid I'd have to wear a mask around the newborn but the doc says I won't need to and that I will get better after the birth and my immunity picks up again. I hope it's quick. I've been miserable about this.

Date Set for Induction

Just as a back-up, if I don't go by my due date, the hospital/doctor has set a time and day for inducing me. January 9th, at 6:30 a.m. But Dr. Arof doesn't think it'll be necessary. Keep your fingers crossed.

Happy New Year

Well, somehow I thought for sure I'd have the baby on the new year but no dice. Mild crampy contractions didn't even keep me awake, and disappeared after a long, hot morning shower. (The "shower test"--if they keep going after a shower or a walk, they are here to stay.)

So anyway I got out the baby's first year calendar and am marking the birth month as January--no need to see if it would have been December anymore--and filling out the months calendar days. It's exciting.

Prenatal Doula Visit

Well Tanya came over and we reviewed our birth plan and various pain management and laboring techniques. It was great. She really knows the various laws pertaining to baby's newborn care, as well as the effects of bonding on development and how to get that precious first hour and a half of wakefulness before the baby does it's first long sleep post birth. I feel like we've learned a lot today. I can't possibly recall it all here, but you get the idea. We have a plan for the labor, and will labor at home as long as we can and get to the hospital in more active labor but certainly before transition phase. She'll be able to check the position of the baby and adjust by pressure points on the pelvis--I'm sure I'm not explaining this perfectly. We also upon admission will get an Ob order to get the lactation consultants at the hospital to come sooner than their usual visit just before we are let out. But if that doesn't work well for us she knows several good local lactation consultants and Tanya will be on call for help as well those first few days. Well, I'm not sure what else to say. I feel so much better now that we have an advocate and someone who will stick with us and help me thru labor. I feel better about a lot of my fears.